Guineas....

Guineas are birds. They are black with white spots. They are about the size of chickens, but much more stupid. Oh yes, more stupid than a chicken. No such thing! You might say. That was my reaction too, until I met a guinea.

This is a flock of guineas. Don't they look stupid?

You know, Mustang, the guinea is REALLY beginning to tick me off.

They waggle their heads around like the idiots they are, all the while squawking their all too annoying ba-GOCK ba-GOCK ba-GOCK. Their squawk usually lasts longer than just three ba-gocks. More like, thirty minutes at the shortest.  They are supremely stupid indeed.

When they run, they sway their heads managing a nice shaking of their entire body whilst they make their running noise, their own version of a turkey's gobble. It doesn't sound much a turkey, however...

You might be wondering if I have an opinion about this. The answer? *innocent face* What makes you think that? 

My family knows a song called "Indescribable" by Chris Tomlin. If you ever decide to go find it on YouTube, you should listen for the part near the beginning  where he sings, "Every creature unique in the song that it sings, all exclaiming..." One day my parents were singing it in church and Mom had to try not to bust out laughing. She thought of that dumb guinea as they sang that line. 

So, another thing you might be wondering is: How do I even know what a guinea is? A simple  answer: When we moved to this house, there were seven guineas. One by one, they got picked off, and now there is one. When we move back to the Ranch, my grandfather has a guinea. He has said that when they start out as a flock, all but one of 'em dies. That one becomes the Lone Ranger. His is their attack guinea. The guinea walks beside the car until they are safely in the driveway. It is a hilarious sight to behold indeed!